If you’ve ever had to watch your parents suffer while you tried your best to comfort them and just be there for them, wondering if you were helping and struggling to find ways to ease their pain, you’ll connect with Now Ex’s stirring new release, “Love On The Side.” We had the pleasure of interviewing Now Ex, and here’s what he had to say:
Q: What was your songwriting process for “Love On The Side”?
NOW EX: Love On The Side is one of the most personal songs I’ve written to date. Sometimes being that open and honest comes naturally with a song, sometimes you feel more guarded. The song is about being there for a parent when they’re having a hard time. It’s not something we’re really prepared to do as kids, and it can be really hard to know how to help. So the song, in a way, is just an offering of friendship and support, a shoulder to cry on. I guess it’s the least you can do, but it’s also everything you need to do. I was staying with my mother in Virginia when I wrote it, late one night on her electric piano. Anyone who knows my music will probably also know that it’s not particularly typical of my general output – it’s more soulful in some ways, perhaps more of a traditional ballad. But that night it just flowed out of me and I couldn’t really stop it. Sometimes a song presents itself and it just is what it is and you don’t know how or why. I certainly felt that way with this one. I don’t even remember writing it, I just remember it coming into existence. Sometimes those are the most satisfying, because you know it was the most organic, and honest thing you could have done in that moment.
Q: What was the inspiration for the video?
NOW EX: Josh Denyer, the dancer in the Love On The Side video, is one of the biggest talents on London’s West End. Funnily enough, I found him because his partner came to see Now Ex play at Camden Assembly back in April 2022. I remember him coming up to me after the gig and saying that I had to work with Josh. At the time I thought nothing of it. But then one day Josh posted a dance cover on Instagram to one of my songs – Spirits In The City – and I was totally blown away. I knew there and then that we needed to do something special together, not shot on an iPhone! And thus this video was born.
When I first sent Josh the song, I wasn’t sure if he was going to be into it – most of what I’d seen him dance to were these big, fast-paced, bombastic songs with a ton of movement and size. This is much more of a slow, expansive piece. But I sent it to him anyway, and he came straight back totally proving my expectations wrong! From the moment he heard it, it was a perfect fit and I knew there and then how special his contribution was going to be. We shot the video in March 2023, in a beautiful, somewhat derelict-feeling South London church called the Asylum Chapel. I’d wanted to film there for ages, and it seemed like the perfect space and aesthetic for this song. But above all else, I think it’s the choreography and the relationship between the two of us in the film that makes it special. Josh is probably the most specific and detail-orientated dancer I’ve met – every single line was layered with subtext, and every movement had a motivation and a bigger meaning that related to the lyric at hand. It was incredible to watch him bring that to life, and I’m so proud of what we all made together. It’s rare to feel that sense of magic when you’re making something, and that whole day is etched into my mind now and forever. It was the perfect reminder of why I’m doing this at all.
Q: What is your best memory from the creative and production process?
NOW EX: It was really special recording this song. Love On The Side was produced by my friend and frequent collaborator Tim Bran, of the production duo MyRiot. Tim and Roy worked on a fair bit of my first EP, as well as music from big names that we all know and love (London Grammar, Halsey, Aurora, Bloc Party, etc). Tim and I went to Narcissus Studios in North West London to record the piano on their incredible Steinway. It’s unlike any piano I’ve played before – it had this rare combination of clean, bright attack, but also beautiful warmth. The piano tone we were going for, in the production process, was something akin to True Love Waits by Radiohead, which is really dark and warm, so this was absolutely perfect. The recording has the size of a grand piano, without the brightness. We then did the vocal back at Tim’s studio, Branland, and created all the weird vocal effects that kind of tied the whole production together. Getting to work with someone as experienced and in demand as Tim, just the two of us, on a song that’s so special to me, is such an awesome memory and I’m forever grateful to him for lending his ingenuity, patience, and incredible skill to my music. We had a lot of fun!
Q: How long have you been making music? How’d you start?
NOW EX: As long as I can remember honestly. I started in the classical world as a little kid. In England, there’s a big history of choral music, and I joined a pretty well-known choir at the age of 8. We would do 6 or 7 performances a week, and that went on in various choirs for about 14 years until I left University. It was a pretty wild musical ride honestly. I got to perform all over the world, from Notre Dame to the Sistine Chapel, to China, to the USA. I also did a season as a soloist in Mozart’s The Magic Flute at the Royal Opera House in Covent Garden, London, in 2008, when I was 13. It wasn’t always an easy life, at such a young age, but it was an incredible musical upbringing that I absolutely wouldn’t change, culminating in a choral scholarship at the University of Oxford, to study Music. An experience I’ll be forever grateful for. I got into songwriting when I was 13 and never looked back. I think it was being so rooted in classic music that made the idea of doing rock or pop so much more exciting. It was kinda the dark side and I was like a moth to the flame. The second it clicked in my brain that I could write songs and have a band of my own, I never looked back. To this day, I’d swap any fancy old chapel or concert hall for a sweaty rock club and I don’t foresee that changing anytime soon.
Q: Are there any musicians who inspire you? What qualities do you admire about them?
NOW EX: Oh my god, so many. My biggest inspiration as a teenager, like many other angsty, arty kids, was Bright Eyes. There was something about the rawness and the darkness of it that I found so otherworldly. I was first shown them by my older cousins in the US who were infinitely cooler than I was, and from the moment I first heard it my life was somewhat different forever. Other artists of massive importance are The Cure, Leonard Cohen, Sufjan Stevens, David Bowie, The National, and Jeff Buckley. The list is endless. They’ve all given me different things and have shaped what Now Ex is all about
Q: What are your interests outside of music?
NOW EX: I’m a filmmaker as well as a musician. I’ve been lucky enough to direct a couple of feature documentaries in the past few years, the first called EuroTrump and the second called In The Cold Dark Night. The latter was nominated for an Emmy award in 2021, which was totally wild. Both were incredibly interesting experiences that I think have totally shaped Now Ex. It’s not really a coincidence that my music videos are so involved and so integral to the branding of the project. I love making them, and it’s endlessly challenging and fun to try and bring the music to life with new visuals. Sometimes I get to combine my filmmaking and music in more substantial ways (something I’m keen to do a lot more of down the line). I recently directed a documentary for VICE about Caroline Calloway, and I got to make 25 mins of music for the film, with my good friend and collaborator Paul Visser a.k.a. GoldCrush. I’m super proud of the soundtrack we created and you can hear some of it on Spotify and all of it on YouTube.
Interviewed by Zoey King
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